Children launch their day in series of long hours play, during which they are liable to hurt themselves causing serious damage. Thereupon, parents find themselves forced to restrain them in a way or another, but then again most prefer intimidation technique as they believe they will reach highest percentage in terms of ensuring end result.
Noticeably, the stick method is imposing itself excluding the carrot and stick method, meaning that parents have a preference for intimidation method on the carrot one, nonetheless each method has its pros and cons. However, in order not to unjustly accuse parents; we are presenting here below some blameless examples where parents wishes the best for their children but fail in their mission.
The first example, when a mother seeing her child’s insistence of playing harmfully resort in the beginning to a nice prohibition, e.g. by explaining that his fall may cause a wound and drip blood. As it is known children commonly hate and fear the blood color, but he carries on harmfully playing. Another one, when she will kindly remind him that he would be deprived of his daily surprise brought back by his father after work, which could be a delicious sweet or juice can. But here again, all temptation attempts miss the mark, and the mother only find a deadlock, she will at that point exclude the promise language and resort to menace language instead.
Then, subconsciously the example that scares the child jumps to the mother mind. That example influencing the child by awe mixed with an urgent desire to escape from the shadow of the aforementioned, the “doctor”. Next she will vividly incite the image of a doctor holding a needle, wildly piking it in the child’s body, causing unbearable pain; and keeps frequently repeating “if you do not stop playing, doctor will come with his horrible needle to pike it in your body then blood will severely shed”. Therefore, the scene suddenly turn from a state of tranquility and self-confidence in the child’s mind, to panic and anticipation tinged with concern and introversion.
The terrified child asks the mother wholeheartedly not to call for the doctor, but his attempts are a total failure in front of his mother ‘s insistence on calling the doctor. Though the scene is purely mimetic, we should not forget that the child does not differentiate between drama and reality.
At that moment, the child escapes to Grandma ‘s lap or find refuge in his big sister sympathy. Eyeing right and left, whenever the doorbell knocks, imagining the doctor had attended with his lethal needle. Here, the mother begins laughing, pleased with her plan success in dissuading her child from on-going to play.
Dear mothers, bear in mind that terrorizing your children via “doctor” is an unsuccessful educational method, moreover has no relation to education methodology at all. The big question is: how are you going to convince your child to go to a doctor if he is really ill and necessarily needs to see a doctor ?!
Finally, there are various ways to prevent the child from randomly playing, in order not to hurt himself, but using the “doctor” label as a scarecrow is totally unacceptable. Not to mention the deep scares that may be carved in the child’s soul, growing as a young man, he will a coward afraid from everything around him. Thus, it would be better if mothers abandon this immoral ancient method, and resort to more modern educational methods belonging to our era, the era of science, knowledge and culture.
Firas Taleb
Translated & Edited by: Lama Al-Hassanieh